Friday, April 30, 2010

Envy and jealousy

I had a great conversation with a friend the other day about an issue that used to bother me a lot. I've been noticing that some people resent you for achieving success. This struck me to the core, because I've been taught since I was young to rejoice at others' success and happiness. Unfortunately, the reality of life is different: people seem to envy and hate you and will seek every opportunities to undermine you instead. Whatever you're up to, bothers them. It is sad, but true.

Then, I came upon this great article by Hellomynameisscott on How to make people hate you (unintentionally :). His story clearly sums up what I've been discussing with my friend, in that people around you can hate you for:

  • being happy and successful in what you do;
  • being more educated and cultured;
  • saying the truth that they are not ready to accept;
  • voicing your honest opinion to them about them;
  • daring to be different from them;
  • having a different mentality from them;
  • breaking the conventional rule.
Knowing that people around me hate me for being who I am bothered me at one point, and for some time I was not able to sleep soundly. I've always considered them as sisters but the feeling was not reciprocated (no discrimination intended... I learned that jealousy usually happens around women of all ages). Soon enough I learned to retrieve myself more and not wanting to reveal too much on what is happening to me, although sometimes they may have been informed about my updates indirectly. I guess this made them hate me more.

After some time, I've managed to clear my mind and rather than becoming one of them, i.e. seek for revenge or hatred, I now have pity for their "underclass" mentality. I'm not worth being a human being if I let them continue to influence my emotions with such ease. They are who they are, I cannot change them, but I still respect them. Let them be miserable in their own miserable world. Karma will get to them sooner or later. I slowly learned to take their words as ghostly winds. In a way, I thank them for teaching me to be stronger and more diplomatic although I'm far away from mastering it.

In relation to this topic, there's a movie that I've always been wanting to watch: Amadeus (1984)... but haven't have the chance yet :(

I will always have gratitude for my DP, DH, teachers and close friends for their patience and support in my development of being a better and bigger person.

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